Let’s start now on one of the most important topics of life, happiness. The purpose of life is to be happy. That’s it. What makes you happy is up to you. Happiness is different for each person. It’s relative. There is an old saying that goes, “Eat, drink and be merry for tomorrow we die.” In fact, in the good book, it also said, “Eat, drink and enjoy your work. Everything else is meaningless.”
There are poor people but seemed happy while there are miserable rich people, so it is not about wealth. There are workers doing their jobs in poor working conditions earning meager wages, barely eating but seemed so fulfilled while there are executives, many in fact, working in the most luxurious offices earning millions but seemed to be so stressed. So it is not about work. There are people who keep changing their partners hoping that the next one will be their “soul mate” but never turned out to be. So it’s not about relationship. There are beautiful people but still not satisfied with the way they look and keep fixing them. So it’s not about appearance. And mind you there are a lot of sick people who are happy too, so it’s not also about health.
The Recipe of Happiness
Straight to the point: What is the recipe for Happiness? The recipe for Happiness is detachment, acceptance, satisfaction, and hope. These are all attitude related. You can argue with me on some points but these are what we observed all these years.
Detachment: In a relationship, it is the absence of fear that your partner will live you, cheat you or not return the love you gave them. There is also the principle of an “I don’t care” attitude here, especially in the appearance aspect. Why should you care what others think of how you look? You are beautiful just the way you are. Nature did that, but man’s prejudistic fashion sense altered human collective taste of what is pretty and what is not. Why do dark-skinned people go through all these dermatology procedures just to look white while the white skinned people go through all the trouble sun tanning just to look dark?
Acceptance: In health, it is the notion that despite being sick you can still do many things even with limitations. Face the truth; we are all going to die. But if you have acceptance and detachment in you, you are not going to be afraid of death. Death is part of life. What you are afraid of are the people and things you will be leaving behind, right? And of course, the scary part of going through the process of dying. It might hurt. And thinking about that is the frightening part. But here’s something you need to know and I bet many of you will hear this the first time. People who die seldom felt the pain of death. The body has a sort of automatic shutdown mechanism that would immune itself from experiencing the pain of dying. Have you noticed that many accident victims don’t recall what happened to them during their mishap? Unfortunately for them, the painful part is if they survived the disaster.
In work, you get the job done despite the odds along the way. Thing is just the way they are, just accept them that way. In a relationship, you have got to accept the defects of you partner. That you loved him/her by who they are lock-stock and barrel, good and bad qualities. Also remember, a person’s attitude rarely changes overnight, it takes some time.
Satisfaction: In wealth, even if you don’t have enough, somehow you can survive with the little you got. You know deep inside that you can get to live through this day, with whatever you got. Here’s something to think about: if you got nothing, you only need two pair of pant, the one that you’re wearing and the other in the laundry. You only need to eat three square meals a day, two shirts, two sets of underwear, a small flat bed with a roof and that’s it, you can get through your day. Here’s where the “I’m OK, everything is OK” principle
or mindset comes in. Remember, the world is like the wheel of the bus, it goes round and round. You are not always on top; neither will you be always at the bottom.
Hope: In a nutshell, hope means expecting something better will come up in the future. Hope means always having a positive mental attitude, always. Hope is having a “move on” attitude. Hope is always looking at the brighter side of things. Hope is knowing that tomorrow is better than today. And it usually is.
Easy to explain, hard to live by, huh? Once you learn to internalize them you will know what I mean. We’ll be discussing these things more in upcoming newsletters or chapters. This is just some sort of prelude to future articles.
In the meantime, I’ll leave you with a short nugget. Whatever makes you happy, do it. Life is not about how long you lived it, it is how happy you lived it. Till then.