Let’s talk about another very important aspect to master in our Simple and Better Life lesson, and that is forgiveness. Contrary to what many of us learned to believe when we were growing up if we do not forgive the person who had offended us, that that person suffers? I don’t think so. For all you know, he/she doesn’t even know they did you wrong. And for all you know, they don’t even care if they did. Now, who is suffering from sleepless nights? Who is boiling with anger waiting to get even? A better question is who’s the LOSER?
Of course, it is human nature that if someone got one over you or did you wrong, your first reaction is to fight back and at least get even. I do not see anything wrong about that. It’s human nature. It’s even animal instinct. But to hold on to the grudge for some time, days, weeks, months, or even years, that is a different story altogether. Even fighting animals don’t hold grudges against each other after a fight.
You see, carrying the grudge for a long time has an adverse effect on oneself, if you will notice. You see, anger is such a powerful energy that when it occupies your mind, it becomes so dominant that your general way of thinking will gravitate more to the negative side. Observe that you spend more time thinking of ways how to extract revenge, how your enemy’s life would become miserable, and so on. In effect, you waste so much time on useless matters than moving on to productive and positive thoughts.
Being so, applying the universal law of attraction, you will only invite the negative energy into your life. And like a powerful magnet attracting like matters, bad situations, misery, depression, despair, misfortune, the whole gang will come in. Correct?
Now I am not saying that we become sissies, wimps or pushovers and just forgive the bully stealing our lunch. No, no. There is a passage in the Holy book that says when someone throws a stone at you, throw them back bread. I agree, on the spiritual level. But on the physical level, for me, is someone throws a stone at me, I’ll throw them bread right, but with Molotov inside.
What I am driving at here, is don’t hold on to a grudge for a long time. It will only have an adverse effect on you. It will waste your time and drain your energy. Better to just move on and, here’s a little secret, “when you forgive it’s the universe that’s going to extract revenge for you.” Bet you didn’t know that. And here’s another very important secret, “don’t rejoice when misery befalls your enemy because the universe can see that too and may also get back at you.” Just forgive and ask the universe for help, it always favors the underdog.
Isn’t it a great world when you are at peace with everybody? When you forgive, you are actually doing yourself a great big favor. You are freeing your conscience, your mind and your spirit from a very vicious energy called anger. This energy, as I mentioned earlier, attracts the negative in your life, wastes your time, is unconstructive and will even make you look ugly, seriously.
Besides what are you trying to prove if you do not forgive, that you are right and they are wrong? Tell you what; I’ll give you another tip. In an argument, discussion or whatever debate let the other party do more of the talking. Why? This is not about winning or losing, I am talking about learning as against showing-off. When you listen, you learn something new, but when you talk, you only repeat what you already know. Right?
In the physical world, when someone did you wrong you will you will naturally get angry, get even and then forgive later on, and probably forget. But the forgetting part will probably take a longer time or in most cases will never happen.
On the spiritual side, when someone did you wrong, just forgive completely. When you do that, his offense against you will forever be embedded in his/her conscience like a curse or debt. The universe has its way of balancing itself will then find a way of rewarding you or punishing him/her. For your part, you do not have to do anything except forgive. But remember, forgiveness is always absolute and sincere; it’s never half-half.
Forgiveness and Forgiving Others
If however you happen to be on the other side and you have done wrong to someone, it is you absolute obligation to ask for forgiveness. Here’s how: Say you are sorry, ask for forgiveness and admit you are absolutely wrong. That will lessen your karma. Never reason out, ever. That would only mean you are not sincere therefore you do not admit that you are wrong. Remember this advice!!!
So what now? Think of the people who did you wrong. Notice that your life is relatively better-off than them, right? You may think that some of them are well-off and happy, but take a closer look. You’ll see a difference and that your life seemed somehow better or on its way to becoming so.
The Holy Book said we should forgive about seventy-seven times something, ok then so let’s start counting.
Forgive your father he left you when you were a kid.
Forgive your mother she nags at you too much.
Forgive your son, he totaled the car.
Forgive your daughter; she has poor choice in men.
Forgive your boss, he is also under pressure.
Forgive your staff; you’re smarter that’s why you’re the boss.
Forgive you clients; they can’t pay because the economy is bad.
Forgive everybody, because life is great.
Forgive the weather; it’s just cleaning up the earth.
And the list goes on . . . .
In the meantime, I’ll leave you with a short nugget. Forgiveness is one of the greatest gifts you can give to yourself, every day. Till next time.
Have a Simple and Better Life