I suppose most of us think that we have lots of true friends in our life, from childhood to school, at work, in clubs, among to neighbors and all. And in these modern times, we can gauge how friends we have by way of Facebook. But what distinguishes real friends from mere acquaintances or just some people you happen to know?
When asked, “Do you know Tony?” There is a big difference between “Yes, I know him” and ”Yes, he’s my friend.”
There are guides to this thing called “choosing your friend process” since the old days. They are applicable now as they were back then. And it’s interesting to re-learn them again because, since the days of our forefathers, we still haven’t learned.
Finding true friends
What will be our measure? Perhaps time? Perhaps comfort? Perhaps security? There are lots of standards. But to summarize some of the old teachings, here are a few guides you may want to ponder upon.
Some friends are there only because it suits them. As long as you are of use, you are a friend. These are mostly higher than you. In some cases, they are the bosses, business partners, and rich and high-status people. But in many cases, they are the shrewd businessmen and politicians. If you are of no use, its goodbye to you. Some won’t even recognize you when you walk up the street.
Some are there merely by coincidence. It just so happens that you were classmates, neighbors or officemates and you have nice things to talk about, you already feel close. Nothing wrong here, but nothing deep too.
Still, some may eventually become your enemy. Be wary about these because people in this category usually have a history or pattern of doing so. Be careful of this kind because these are the backstabbers. They are friendly in front of you but will talk behind your back.
Others will not be around in times of sorrow. Only in good times, will they be, but in bad times they are nowhere to be found.
And also there are friends for the wrong reasons like gangs, drinking and gambling buddies.
Test your acquaintances first. Do not just open up your life story to anyone nor open your doors to any stranger.
One of the best ways to know who are your true friends from your mere acquaintances is during hard times. Your real friends will always be there no matter what. In some cases, the people you thought to be real friends will abandon you and the least likely you expect are the ones who would be by your side. Only in bad times will you know who they are. Bad times are a kind of sorting out times.
If you find someone where your interests are put ahead of theirs or you became a better person because of them that is a person worthy to be called your friend. That person is worth more than any treasure on earth. That you will know when you are down and you are in need of a friend.
True friends are more valuable than all the riches in this world. Money may come and go but a true friend is hard to find and will always be there for you.
Many married couples usually started off as best friends before they became husbands and wives. In many cases, however, they end up quarreling couples and in some cases, split-up become bitter enemies. But the best scenario is when a couple who were not really that “close” in the beginning but as the years went by grew to develop a caring feeling towards each other during their time together eventually become the best of friends.
I hope this article will be very helpful to you in finding your real friends. But remember friendship is not a one-way street. You must PROVE that you are ALSO WORTHY of being a TRUE FRIEND. In order to make lives better for us, that friendship qualities must start from us. Then you will attract persons, people radiating the same aura, the same vibrations as what you are projecting and more real friends will come your way.
Oh and by the way, do not mind it if others do not reciprocate your good nature. The universal balance wheel always has a way of leveling things out. The same holds true if you do not appreciate the goodness in others. That is a Law.